Clever Private Equity Idioms and Anecdotes from an Outsider's Experience on the Inside
dancing between the toes of elephants
Clever Private Equity Idioms and Anecdotes from an Outsider's Experience on the Inside
this book isn't a manual. it's a mirror
237 Metaphors, Maxims & Musings from the Trenches of Private Equity
In Dancing Between the Toes of Elephants, seasoned private equity investor Michael Magliochetti distills decades of front-line operating and private equity experience into 237 punchy, insightful, and often hilarious micro-stories. Each one captures a moment — a meeting, a metaphor, a maxim — that reveals the unique blend of instinct, grit, and humanity required to thrive in the lower middle market.
From “Stick Feel” to “Goat Rodeo,” from “You’ll Never Get a Black Eye on the Phone” to “Snap the Chalk Line,” this book is a must-read for anyone who’s ever tried to grow a business, manage a team, close a deal, or navigate a boardroom full of sharp elbows and sharper wits.
LESSONS, LAUGHS, AND A FEW BRUISES.
What happens when a chemical engineer turned CEO turned PE investor writes down all the things people actually say behind closed doors? You get Dancing Between the Toes of Elephants — 237 fast-paced stories drawn from a life in the trenches of private equity and operating leadership.
From metaphor to gut instinct, from M&A to Monday mornings, Michael Magliochetti captures the humor, wisdom, and sharp elbows that define the real world of deals, diligence, and decision-making. These stories are entertaining, insightful, and most importantly — relatable to anyone who’s ever tried to get a business to grow, a deal to close, or a management team to align.
Each vignette captures a truth — about competition, people, fear, hope, ego, and capital — through vivid analogies and colorful, real-world dialogue.
Short Stories. Deep Experience. Real Lessons.
Here's a taste of what you'll find....
- “Play to the Back of the Baseball Card”
- “You’ll Never Get a Black Eye on the Phone”
- “Hair on the Deal”
- “The Vacuum and the Clean Floor”
- “Put More Wood Behind the Arrow”
- “Hide the Brush Strokes”
- “Pull an Inside Straight”
- “You Can’t Put a Shine on Shit”
- and much more!!
Don’t let the wit fool you — these are hard-earned insights from someone who’s danced between giants, stayed on his feet, and has the scars (and stories) to prove it.
ABOUT THE AUTHOR
MICHAEL MAGLIOCHETTI, PH.D.
Michael Magliochetti is an Operating Partner in private equity with Boston-based Riverside Partners and is a veteran of dozens of deals, exits, and operational transformations. With a focus on founder-led companies and the lower middle market, Michael has spent his career in between Wall Street and Main Street, strategy and sweat, theory and real life.
This book is his love letter to the art and absurdity of building value. Although this is his first book — but the stories have been years in the making.
For Builders, Backers & Students of the Game
Doers, Dealmakers & the Curious Onlookers
- Private Equity professionals
- Founders and Operators
- MBAs who want to hear what really happens
- Board Members, Advisors, and Execs
- Deal Junkies and Reluctant CFOs
- Business Students who want the unfiltered view
- Leaders who’ve been in the room when things got... weird
- Anyone who’s ever uttered the phrase, “We need to unpack that.”